I joined the raid on Indom in Hive 1, which was formed by the same player who's been forming the Hamikaze raids for a couple of weeks.
Thought it would go well, saw few old timers. Then the Leader started PM'ing me questions about how to do the old school method and eventually conned me into taking lead (something I quit doing months ago as i hate dealing with people who simply cannot read or follow directions).
NP I thought, I've led raids before Hamikaze became a thing.
Went over instructions, asked for Ranged, Melee and CC leads..... and a Hami Taunter and pocket healer for him/her just in case......... Dead Silence. Start to get a bad feeling.
Asked again...... only response was several asking if they could start GMs now. Apprehension grows.
Fine I thought, I'll just assign the color leaders. Picked 3 I had seen at raids regularly for a few months..... then repeated instructions. Green leader (with 35+ vet levels) PM's me to ask what CC means. Voice in my head says "Weeee'sa gonna DIE!"
Carefully explain once again, instructing ranged, control and melee to follow their leads while Hami Tank holds his attention (while this is happening several are off fighting GM's and spamming about when are we gonna start. Maybe I should have stayed for the second MSR I think to myself.
Go over instructions one last time, give orders to start GM's and boom game crashes...... Guardian Angel looking over me maybe? Logging back in I'm bombarded by tells asking why I quit, explain i didn't but am in Hive 2 now. Exit and try to enter Hive 1 which it let me do (a fact I'll later regret). New leader throws League lead back at me like it's hot.
Notice in coalition chat a well known Raid leader just asked if there is room on raid, noting one of the impatient members of league has left I invite her, sending her a tell that I'll give league lead as soon as she zones in. But NOPE Hive1 now full she's locked out and gets to go to Hive 2, lucky her.
Hami Spawns, we regroup at rock, I post color leads in chat once more and remind everyone to keep their EoE buff up..... and immediately get several tells asking what an EoE buff is....... I pour myself a double whiskey.
I Begin count down..... 5... 4.... 3.... 2.... (several members suddenly die having raced ahead) 1.... Dive!
I see several ranged players following the melee lead, 2-3 more people just die from terminal ignorance..... main tank flatlines (seems his pocket healer/buffer forgot how to heal/buff). NP we can recover I think.... Hami laughs at me.
We get most of the blues down somehow by my third EoE, note people still at rock. Finish my whiskey.
Blues down, on to yellows..... Main tank has ceased all attempts at taunting and Hami is knocking us around like bowling pins.
Yellows down at last.... attempt to start on greens, no dice. Half of league is down or returning from hospital. CC group is scattered or posting on twitter.
I Yell for everyone to retreat and regroup, make it back to rock with maybe 2% health remaining....... TWO people listened and followed me.... TWO!!!!
Time for another whiskey.
Few minutes (and many deaths later) I manage to get everyone back to rock, just greens and Hami Left. Announce that we will start with closest Green Mito and work clockwise.... amazingly we kill all greens without a hiccup this time and start on Hami. I feel a small surge of hope...... foolish me.
At the 75% mark I Yell for everyone to withdraw...... get back to rock with the 2/3s of league that managed to suddenly develop reading skills in the last 10 minutes.... we watch the Illiterate die. Several players quit, declaring this is too hard and not fair, including the guy who formed the league to begin with.
Second whiskey gone.....
Finally those who remain regroup, we launch second dive and things get even worse..... Main Tank quits mid dive. Attacking blues, 1 down.... I die beneath Hami's gelatinous heel. Rez, die... get rezzed manage to pop my last EoE (started with 10) as I'm reduced to near death again. Have ranged people attacking greens, yellows, woodchucks.... bushes who looked at them funny. Basically everything except what ranged lead is targeting.
I go back to rock, open ouro, hit quit league.
In Ouro, I pour another whiskey which I sip as I write "REMEMBER..... Do NOT volunteer for Hami League lead again" on a post-it note and put it over my monitor.
Join a Few BaFs, and an ITF and enjoy killing crap for another hour or so.
R.I.P. Hamikaze