Your News at 11 Episode 4: Spamburglar Kills the Night 06Sep25

[david665]

TRISH TAKANAWA (in studio, solemn):
“Good evening. I’m Trish Takanawa, Senior Meta-Human Affairs Correspondent. Tonight, the underworld of Port Oakes reels from shocking developments: the feared Snake enforcer known only as The Night Killer has been brought down—by none other than the eccentric criminal newcomer, The Spamburgler.

Eyewitnesses describe a violent confrontation in the alleyways near Pier Seven. A local barfly told PNN, ‘I heard this wet, smacking sound… then saw cans flying through the air like bullets. Next thing I know, Night Killer’s on the pavement, not moving.’ Another passerby, trembling, added, ‘The Spamburgler kept chanting about “meat reclaiming the night” as he hammered the Snake. It wasn’t a joke. It was terrifying.’

The status of The Night Killer remains unconfirmed—Arachnos authorities have yet to verify if he is dead or merely incapacitated. Captain Verax of Arachnos law enforcement gave this official statement: ‘We do not condone vigilante actions, particularly from costumed criminals. The Spamburgler’s assault represents an escalation of gang warfare that Arachnos will not tolerate. If The Night Killer has indeed fallen, it could trigger unpredictable reprisals from the Snakes.’

For now, Port Oakes is tense. The Spamburgler has risen from punchline to power player, and the streets wait anxiously to see who—if anyone—dares challenge him next.

For Paragon News Network, I’m Trish Takanawa. This is Your News at 11.”