Your News at 11 Episode 12: Spamburglar Melts Snow Maiden 12Sep25

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[P.N.N. – YOUR NEWS AT 11, PORT OAKES]

 

TRISH TAKANAWA (on-scene, serious, standing near a quarantined Arachnos checkpoint):
“Good evening. I’m Trish Takanawa, Senior Meta-Human Affairs Correspondent. Tonight, Port Oakes finds itself at the epicenter of a crisis. The bizarre but increasingly dangerous criminal known as The Spamburglar has struck again—this time stealing a highly classified bioweapon codenamed ‘Outbreak.’

Sources confirm the theft occurred during a covert transfer, with Arachnos security already stretched thin. Spamburglar, reportedly under contract to an as-yet-unidentified benefactor, successfully extracted the virus sample despite the intervention of the Cryokinetic vigilante Snow Maiden and several Longbow operatives.

 

[Cut to eyewitness testimony, a local dockworker clutching a cigarette with shaking hands.]
‘It was like a storm hit—ice and meat flying everywhere. Snow Maiden froze whole walls to keep him boxed in, but he just smashed through them. He didn’t even slow down. I swear I saw her fall under a hail of—of canned meat. The Longbow operators didn't know what hit them. It was fists, feet, cans and snow and ice everywhere. He just appeared out of nowhere, beat them down and faded away again. It was wild.’

 

[Cut back to Trish, voice steady.]
“Reports indicate Snow Maiden fought valiantly but was ultimately overwhelmed. Her current condition remains unknown, though medical teams confirm she was taken from the scene unconscious but alive. Arachnos law enforcement has moved quickly to contain fallout. Captain Verax, speaking moments ago, gave this official statement.”

 

[Cut to Captain Verax, face grim beneath his Arachnos insignia.]
‘The theft of a bioweapon is not a novelty crime—it is an act of war against stability. The Spamburglar may mask his actions in absurd theatrics, but he is a mercenary delivering devastation into unknown hands. Arachnos will hunt him down, and when we do, neither he nor his employer will find mercy.’

 

[Cut back to Trish, the scene behind her cordoned off with red quarantine barriers.]
“Tonight, Port Oakes stands on edge. With Outbreak now in the hands of an unknown buyer, and with one of its most stalwart defenders, Snow Maiden, defeated, the question is not whether The Spamburglar is a threat—it is how far his strange brand of villainy is willing to go.

 

For Paragon News Network, I’m Trish Takanawa. This is Your News at 11.”