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The Synapse Point Paradox


Dev7on

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Sensing a electrical disturbance in neighboring Steel Canyon, Synapse gathered together eight heroes to investigate. They battled through a warehouse of bizarre but deadly wind-up robots, then another, and another. And another, and another, and... there were a lot of robots, is the takeaway here. But at long last, the evil Clockwork King was vanquished, and the heroes gathered around Synapse, tired but exuberant. All this happened, more or less.

 

Princess Punchy went off to train, while Hot Prick and Lady Blackstar slowly walked off to his base, hand in hand. Mystress Yiffstress smiled at Synapse, who met her gaze, and soon the two were in a disused restroom in the basement of the nearby hospital. Less than two minutes later, however, the restroom door opened again.

 

"So, um..."

 

"Hey, it's no biggie."

 

"But..."

 

"T'sokay. I mean, you are the fastest man alive, right? Comes with the territory."


1) Synapse has decided that being super fast has some, uh, disadvantages, so he wants to go back in time and prevent Crey from doing the experiment that gave him super speed. Because he has access to Ouroboros from attending Manticore's wedding (really), Synapse jumps back in time and bonks the Crey scientists on the head, then returns to the present and is surprised to find that things have changed, so he asks Mystress Yiffstress to accompany him to see Manticore.

 

At this point I need to mention that the player did not, in fact, go back in time for Crey-bonking. All that happened in dialog.

 

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The mission itself consists of the player arriving at the Manticore's Merry Mansion map, meeting a depowered Steven Berry (that's Synapse), then meeting with Manticore who attacks you because he doesn't know you, then speaking with Manti afterwards, who gives you an infodump on how a whole bunch of stuff is different. Gee, turns out that going back in time and making changes can affect the present! Whooda thunk it?

 

2) Indigo has been kidnapped, so Mystress goes into a warehouse filled with Battle Maiden's troops, meets up with Crimson, then rescues Indigo. We exit the missions and...

 

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This guy's style of storytelling seriously rubs me the wrong way. People want to do stuff, not be told they did stuff. Like, for the Penelope Yin TF, imagine if you clicked Penny and text appeared saying "You clobber some Freakshow, then more Freakshow, then some Council, then defeat Clamor and save the day. Here's some merits." And that bit is even worse, like if you completed Penny but a popup after the last mission said "Oops someone sneezed on the sonic device and it destroyed all of Paragon. You suck."

 

3) We need to rescue Dr. Aeon from the Circle for some reason, so we yiff into the Infernal map, pummel the Baphomet EB who summons swarm of demons, and rescue Aeon, who gives us another infodump, then...

 

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...sigh.

 

4) Now we need to rescue Statesman from Crey, so we go to a lab that's filled with Malta, find him and three heroes, then defeat a security guard who is a Warwork and summons huge waves of Malta ambushes. Yiffstress and her swarm of fluffy, cuddly beasts are unable to take down the huge swarms of Malta, so I log off and switch to Spider-Kitty, slog through the previous waves and take care of business. This should give you some idea of the lengths I go to provide quality AE reviews, and should not be taken to mean that I spend sixteen hours a day in front of the computer playing CoX and swilling Night Train, honest. Oh yeah, did I mention that you have to lead Statesman back through five floors to the exit? Yeah.

 

That mission did have one bright spot; before being repeatedly obliterated by the massive Malta ambush, Mystress Yiffstress got a Fury of the Gladiator -res proc as a drop. Back on the Live server, that recipe consistently sold for two BILLION at the auction house. And that's only because 2 billion is the most a player can have, so it would have sold for more if that were possible. Apparently the people at The Secret Server That No One Knows About were responsible for this change, so thanks guys.

 

5) Statesman can't help us, so it's up to me to finish the war (what war?). Off to the destroyed Atlas map, with three heroes as allies and eight to beat. Most are EBs, but Malaise is Hero class, making him pretty much impossible for non-Incarnates to solo. At the end, Synapse goes back in time again and hits the History Eraser Button, returning everything back to normal.

 

This arc has big problems. First of all, the dialog is very blah, with no quotes or indents. The writing is incredibly exposition heavy, with the player told 'this happened' more often than doing stuff. On top of that, there's a lot of spelling errors, and I mean a LOT. The gameplay has problems too, with several very tough spots. Finally, Synapse and the player are forced to carry the Idiot Ball, with both seemingly surprised that going back in time will change the present. About the only good thing about this arc is that the mobs have a chance to drop PvP recipes.

 

 

Edited by Kyksie
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