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[Arc ID: 25334] Moonstar ULTIMATE: Part 5


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Another week stuck at home, and many of us are starting to go off the deep end from boredom. Alphabetizing the spice rack and watching the entirety of Bewitched on Netflix only go so far, leaving us scrambling for ways to fill the time. Instead of filming your own telenovella or building a 1/10 scale replica of the Alamo in the backyard, Moonstar ULTIMATE: Part 5 gives us a way to make the hours fly by.


1) Again, the contact is Celeste Moonstar, who tells us that the assault on THE ENTITY is beginning. However, we still haven't been told who or what THE ENTITY is. Spider-Kitty does a quick Google, and the only thing she finds is a 1982 movie about a woman raped by a ghost. Hopefully that isn't what we'll be facing here, but Kitty checks her dentata just in case.


Stepping into the portal, we are unexpectedly flung backwards in time to...




...Poohland? Poohland??? Kitty looks around frantically but doesn't see Tigger or Christopher Robin anywhere. Why is this world named Poohland? I can only think of one other reason why a world would be called that, and it ain't pretty.


After a few minutes behind a dumpster, Spider Kitty begins searching Poohland, which looks a lot like Skyway. There are five EBs, collectively known as ???, from which I can only assume they're as confused as I am. They're pretty tough, but nothing can stand in the way of a fully incarnated Crab Spider. Except lawn sprinklers. Kitty hates those.


2) Again we're flung back in time to "Red City", which resembles Cap au Diable, but at least it doesn't smell as bad as the previous map. Five more ??? EBs, with no descriptions, and their only combat chat is "...".


3) Now we need to go to Kitty's timelime, which is "Tech Square" in 2010. Eleven EBs are waiting to be clobbered, with names like Ambrose Beepboop and Belle Beachball. The map is the instanced one with the SERAPH labs submap, making many of the mobs unaccessable unless the player knows enough to click on a particular door.


4) Time to enter Future Sonic's timeline for some reason. Kitty is sent to the Altas Park map and finds it occupied by twelve, yes, twelve EBs, at which point I threw down the mouse and closed the arc.


Moonstar ULTIMATE: Part 5 is a time-waster of epic proportions. If you're a full-time basement dweller looking to while away the days until the next episode of Super Kawaii Ninja Schoolgirl Panty Raid, this arc is just what the doctor ordered. Everyone else, stay away.



Edited by Kyksie
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