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"...why do they always have to go bigger?"

 

 

What we know so far:

Spoiler
  • Allegedly the last Jurassic movie.*
  • Reunites all of the surviving above-the-line cast from both halves of the franchise - Sam Neill, Laura Dern, Jeff Goldblum and BD Wong, plus Bryce Dallas Howard and Pratt.  Note BDH now gets top billing above Pratt. As she should.
  • Regular sci-fi favourite Dichen Lachman signing up too.  Probably doing something attractively evil. It's a living.
  • Return of the novel's main antagonist Dr. Lewis Dodgson (Alice In Wonderland ref, natch). He appears briefly in the first movie, paying off Nedry to sabotage the park, and is probably Dr. Wu's new boss. As the original actor is... no longer suitable, he's been replaced by journeyman actor Campbell Scott. That's a lot of weight for a new guy, even with dinos to play off.
  • The actual plot is... well, probably irrelevant, but dinos now live and thrive worldwide.
  • How they did that in four years is unclear, unless Hammond and co artificially accelerated the breeding and growth cycles, or Dodgson had a breeding programme of his own and is releasing them. But I think we're not supposed to question stuff like that. 
  • There's a now an ickle cute Baby Blue who needs protecting. At a guess from the portentious scripting, half of the people looking for Blue are military who want a weapon and the other half want them exterminated. 
  • Rule Of Cool scenes (that we know about): moped chase vs raptors through Valletta in Malta, possibly doubling for Rome, the attack on the drive-in from the teaser trailer, and a herd migrating into a frozen tundra. Possibly Wisconsin. Maybe they like cheese.

 

*IMDB already lists a reboot as In Development. FFS...

WAKE UP YA MISCREANTS AND... HEY, GET YOUR OWN DAMN SIGNATURE.

Look out for me being generally cool, stylish and funny (delete as applicable) on Excelsior.

 

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