cranebump Posted October 9, 2022 Share Posted October 9, 2022 Inspired by @TerroirNoir's run through Ordinary People (and later, Leviathan), I've decided to revisit and modify my original Mobius storyline, as a way to knit the other two arcs together (once and for all!) [or is it? {yes it is...maybe}].:-) To that end: Design Notes: Looks pretty solid, textually. Didn't find any major issues (someone else will mayhap?). Arc makes use of Begin Mish clues to push the narrative. You'll get more outa this if you don't mind reading them. If you played the old Much Madness, this is similar, mission-wise. But I streamlined the contact screen by concentrating on trad single contact verbiage, versus the back-n-forth dialogue I had between other characters "off screen." Also: tweaked some NPC verbiage. Added a few minor pieces of window dressing to "explain" the bad guys' modus operandi. Slightly increased Westbrush's role (as a precursor to maybe using him down the road as a "friendly antagonist." Hint of things to come here and there, as well. Still using those damned snake eggs to represent other things, though.:-) NOTE: Not to spoil anything, but (a) if you can't get really vertical, you'll want a jetpack before you go in (thanks to Skyway overpass map in mish #1); and (b) I found Break Frees very helpful. Enjoy! Crane 2 I have done a TON of AE work, both long form and single arc. Just search the AE mish list for my sig @cranebump. For more information on my stories, head to the AE forum sub-heading and look for “Crane’s World.” Support your AE authors! We ARE the new content. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TerroirNoir Posted October 9, 2022 Share Posted October 9, 2022 Ok, Added to the list! It will be a little while yet though! Great to be back in CoX! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cranebump Posted October 9, 2022 Author Share Posted October 9, 2022 Backburner it, kemosabe. I've got a long way to go myself to finish it.:-) 1 I have done a TON of AE work, both long form and single arc. Just search the AE mish list for my sig @cranebump. For more information on my stories, head to the AE forum sub-heading and look for “Crane’s World.” Support your AE authors! We ARE the new content. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zhym Posted November 7, 2022 Share Posted November 7, 2022 (edited) I posted this in @TerroirNoir's thread, but since there's a thread dedicated to this arc, here it is again: So, about that 10-minute timer, @cranebump... I'm guessing you're going for something sort of like the start of "The Reports of My Death Are Entirely Accurate" (which, you're right, is an excellent arc). But in that one, Reveal hidden contents It's pretty clear that you're meant to fail. There are three mission objectives you can get, and then one that outright says there isn't enough time. And there's also that part where you're told that this is the story of your death, so it's not like the player should expect to win that mission! The first mission of Mobius 1, though—well, it sure seems like a no-win story opener. But the timer is just tight enough (or long enough) that maybe the player could win? I honestly couldn't tell—and that was kind of frustrating, to be honest. Reveal hidden contents So first, I had to find Positron. And I didn't know if that mean that he was standing around somewhere to be "rescued" or if I needed to be searching body bags. So I searched body bags—many, many, many body bags—and didn't find him. Then I finally came across Positron, and that spawned someone else I needed to search the map for. Zoria. Sigh. More hopping around what's a fairly big map, then. I find Zoria, fight more mobs...and then get five more targets I need to clear. Really? Really? At this point, I have about four minutes to find and defeat five targets. I make a game go of it, but...yeah, not happening. Mission failed. Now, maybe the mission is supposed to fail. And even if I'd "won," I'd have lost (shades of the "Rescue Comrade" mission, there). But if so, isn't the timer kind of unnecessary? That map has so much going on, and so much atmosphere, that putting a time limit on it is kind of a shame, IMO. And it's not like you're fighting time at the end of the world—the world's going to be ended for a long time. I get that it's all a dream, and dreams sort of have time limits, but time also works weirdly in dreams. So I don't think it needs to be there the way the timer in "The Reports of My Death" does. And if it seems like it's possible to win a mission, certain players are going to fixate on winning the mission even if that would have no effect on the story. Not that I know any players like that. Nope. So, maybe consider removing the timer from that mission? Edited November 7, 2022 by Zhym 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cranebump Posted November 7, 2022 Author Share Posted November 7, 2022 I laid out my reasoning in the other thread. For the record, I’m not emulating Peacock. I’m trying to do a no-win scenario. The issue is visibility. Makes it to where you can’t even reach the boss fights. I might fiddle with it some other day, but not today. Timer is there so players don’t waste a ton of time trying to win what cannot be won. I have done a TON of AE work, both long form and single arc. Just search the AE mish list for my sig @cranebump. For more information on my stories, head to the AE forum sub-heading and look for “Crane’s World.” Support your AE authors! We ARE the new content. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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