New low level hero arc with Snakes looking for feedback #41022

[DougGraves]

Level 1-9 arc for heroes with Snakes, Arachnos, and Rippers.  The idea is a SFMA for heroes with enemies they do not normally face.

[Take One]

The mind-controlled civilians don't have a description. A simple line like "This individual seems to be under the snakes' control" would suffice.

 

Mission 2 has a much higher max level than the others, and no clue attached to it. Mongoose's information could be in the form of a clue, for example. The level range can be set under Mission Parameters for each mission. It's usually best if the range is the same for all missions, unless there's a good reason for changing them around (like a flashback scene, or maybe some kind of effect that diminishes the character' power).

 

Mission 5 has a strange typo with a long line of %-symbols in the briefing text. The scattered collectible items which had started out as grey seemed to activate randomly which was interesting but I didn't click them all to see if it would reveal something. I guess they were set to activate at the death of the boss and were just "dungeon dressing"?

 

I liked the story, it was a simple introduction to the snakes, which still took you around a bunch of locales. The mechanics were simple but effective, and immediately showed that these snakes could control people. At this level range you don't need to get too complicated.

Edited July 9, 2021 by Take One

[cranebump]

Ran this puppy with my AE-only toon. Had fun with it! Full review and comments are in the Josh Jones arc.

[DougGraves]

On 7/9/2021 at 12:08 PM, Take One said:

The mind-controlled civilians don't have a description. A simple line like "This individual seems to be under the snakes' control" would suffice.

 

Mission 2 has a much higher max level than the others, and no clue attached to it. Mongoose's information could be in the form of a clue, for example. The level range can be set under Mission Parameters for each mission. It's usually best if the range is the same for all missions, unless there's a good reason for changing them around (like a flashback scene, or maybe some kind of effect that diminishes the character' power).

 

Mission 5 has a strange typo with a long line of %-symbols in the briefing text. The scattered collectible items which had started out as grey seemed to activate randomly which was interesting but I didn't click them all to see if it would reveal something. I guess they were set to activate at the death of the boss and were just "dungeon dressing"?

 

I liked the story, it was a simple introduction to the snakes, which still took you around a bunch of locales. The mechanics were simple but effective, and immediately showed that these snakes could control people. At this level range you don't need to get too complicated.

 

I like the idea of putting in a mind controlled description, but I cannot figure how to set descriptions for the ally group with a boss.

 

I set the missions to levels 1-9 for all 5 missions.

 

Added a clue when you rescue Mongoose.

 

I fixed the typo.  It just had a bunch of %'s for some reason.

 

The scattered collectibles are just dungeon dressing.  2 are supposed to trigger when the boss is defeated and the rest after that collection is done.

 

Thanks for the review and the feedback.

Edited August 17, 2021 by DougGraves

[DougGraves]

On 7/12/2021 at 9:44 AM, cranebump said:

Ran this puppy with my AE-only toon. Had fun with it! Full review and comments are in the Josh Jones arc.

 

thanks for the feedback.  I fixed the typo.

 

The contact was first written using a lot of business jargon but I found it too annoying, so I cut that down and made her more business like.

 

The End at the Beginning refers to that is where Arachnos got the initial eggs and started the whole project.  I'll see if I can explain that in the mission text.

 

I don't know why you are immune to the mind control.  I could have an explanation but I worried it would not fit all of the characters.  I could just say your will is so strong.

[Take One]

6 hours ago, DougGraves said:

I like the idea of putting in a mind controlled description, but I cannot figure how to set descriptions for the ally group with a boss.

 

 

I don't know how you set up your ally group, if they are custom made or a standard group - I can't remember - but if they are custom made you should be able to open them up in the critter editor and add a bio on the last page in the editor, where you write their name. Look under "My creations" and "My enemies" I think it's called, and you can edit every custom mob you've created. Afterwards you might want to edit your story and republish to make sure that it is updated with the changes you made. If I'm mistaken about any of this I'm sure someone will show up and correct me.