Lojac's Brain

[raven9864]

The exciting sequel to my series "The Grave and the Old" has begun, and the first part is now published.

 

Lojac's Brain picks up the story and expands on my world building efforts. Its still being tweaked and that's where you come in.

 

Please provide technical and constructive criticism for mechanics and story as you see fit. I'd love to know how you think this product is developing.

 

Its story based fun, that I hope also provides a challenging tactical experience, and chock full of Easter eggs, drama, comedy, horror, and weird science.

 

"The Grave and the Old" and 'Lojac's Brain" contain lots of custom characters, original (I hope) themes, and there is an SG available to join that these missions are based on.

 

These missions afford opportunities for RP aplenty, but isn't essential to its playability. Its not a farm.

 

Give it a try for Lojac. He's counting on you.

 

~Paws

 

 

[cranebump]

I'll give it a run Friday morning. Probably won't be quite as detailed as I was in other story.:-)

[raven9864]

TYVM Crane.

 

I implemented several of your suggestions...most of them...into TGa/tO. I'm most proud of the new enemy group/faction I implemented.

 

Question: Do I have to use html to change font colors?

 

~Paws

[cranebump]

Font color code is a menu option. You can highlight and select it. There’s additional colors if you know the codes. I think @Darmian knows about that. I would think @Ankylosaur would have some expertise in this, too.

[cranebump]

Ran it. A few comments:

Spoiler

• Let's streamline your Arc desc. 
• Color code titles & sub titles. It's like an advert, and you want me to always be reminded what arc I'm playing. So I should see, on contact screen:

Lojac's Brain

Part 1. Mish Title

• Tone/presentation of Blackpaws is excellent. Seems like a no-nonsense, military-precision type guy. Nice work.
• Hehehe. Love the mish entry popup
• Woo...10 is a lot of collections. Even so, edit your objectives using the Plural and Singular entry spaces. I should read "10 Portable Surgery Stations to investigate" (or destroy or whatever), and, on the last one "Investigate the last..." (I make this presentational error ALL the time btw). I'm fixing arcs I made years ago because of it.
• Critter text is excellent.
• Glowie text: use the Begin interaction for things like "You place the device..." or "You begin to..." And then the interact text for what's occuring (EX: "You place the teleport trigger on the device...")
• I'm not sure we really need 10 glowies, BUT...if you cut the number down, to, say, 5-6, I think they would all appear in the same room, which makes it less annoying for the player (because the glowies are all the same), and has the added bonus of making it seem like it's the perps "storage room" or "test area." Then the extra become window dressing, which is a nice touch. You can also make it to where you only need one glowie, but you can set up additional, non-clickable ones in the same area, provided you connect them to a front spawn that the player won't return to to activate the chain. Then you give them the clue, you keep the window dressing, and the mish moves on.
• Holy f***, a truck! HA! Right on top of me. FYI: The truck objective test is the same as the general text when it appears. I know I'm supposed to "Destroy Truck," but the text says "The Sound of a Truck" or something like that. Technically, it's a description and not an objective.
• Good dialogue, but don't put quotes around any of it. They're not quoting anyone, they're just talking.
• I didn't bother to check whether the prisoner's animation was "Wounded." If so, I'd use that for his captive and rescue animations. You can also use Dead Slab to have him fall down, then get back up upon rescue. If you wanted that.
• It's a long run back, and the map is empty. Consider throwing some patrols in after rescue is complete.
• Tb perfectly honest, if possible, I'd just have the poss pop in in the back, have me fight them, with the ally in tow. Then, after I beat them, just end mish there. Escorts aren't a favorite for most players, esp if the map is large, or the run is long, like this one. Seriously, it's a long run. 
• 
• By the way. I lead the guy out, without engaging Death Angel, and the mish completed.:-/ If you really want me to fight 'em, make it an objective.
• The various clues are great. Grist. Bone Guard. it's appropriately sinister.
• I'd avoid giving the PC too much dialogue in the clue text. It's a turn off for some players.  You can sorta work around this by saying, You put in a request for a teleport. AND a new, less brain-covered change of wardrobe when you get back.
• FYI: "Intel" is on l. I used to work in Army Intelligence. I know. Oxymoron and all that.:-)

Overall: It's a strong start, but I'd say there are some "must changes:"

• Fewer glowies. Maybe even only 1, if we're mainly just getting a clue with them. I'd work on "window dressing" the middle area, having the one active glowie.
• Boss fight: If you want me to fight them for sure, make them ab objective, then have them pop in with the Truck in the back (btw, that was GREAT--just this damned truck all of a sudden. It makes no sense how it got there, but it was great).:-)
• In conjunction with the above, remove the long escort. Keep the "Defeat Death Angel to Escape." Make the escort a non-combatant so they can't be targeted, then the mish will end when the boss dies, and it can be assumed I waltzed out of there.
• We really need a dossier on on SFA.  I'm still in the dark about who they are and why I'm working with them. World-building, yes. But where in the world do they fit in? If you want to keep things close to the vest, then maybe everything's just classified, and somehow I get drafted or something. I did read the contact text

 

I like the customs. I like the contact. I like the map and feel. I'd like more of that background to be foreground. (I'm hoping I didn't miss something when I read contact desc. Maybe SFA stuff was all in there?).

 

Pretty strong start. Tweak it a bit, then drive on, hombre!

 

[raven9864]

On 6/13/2023 at 6:18 PM, cranebump said:

Font color code is a menu option. You can highlight and select it. There’s additional colors if you know the codes. I think @Darmian knows about that. I would think @Ankylosaur would have some expertise in this, too.

I got some help from @Darmian yesterday, and am currently going back and adding font colors to "The Grave and the Old" and "Lojac's Brain".

[raven9864]

19 hours ago, cranebump said:

Ran it. A few comments:

  Reveal hidden contents

• Let's streamline your Arc desc. 
• Color code titles & sub titles. It's like an advert, and you want me to always be reminded what arc I'm playing. So I should see, on contact screen:

Lojac's Brain

Part 1. Mish Title

• Tone/presentation of Blackpaws is excellent. Seems like a no-nonsense, military-precision type guy. Nice work.
• Hehehe. Love the mish entry popup
• Woo...10 is a lot of collections. Even so, edit your objectives using the Plural and Singular entry spaces. I should read "10 Portable Surgery Stations to investigate" (or destroy or whatever), and, on the last one "Investigate the last..." (I make this presentational error ALL the time btw). I'm fixing arcs I made years ago because of it.
• Critter text is excellent.
• Glowie text: use the Begin interaction for things like "You place the device..." or "You begin to..." And then the interact text for what's occuring (EX: "You place the teleport trigger on the device...")
• I'm not sure we really need 10 glowies, BUT...if you cut the number down, to, say, 5-6, I think they would all appear in the same room, which makes it less annoying for the player (because the glowies are all the same), and has the added bonus of making it seem like it's the perps "storage room" or "test area." Then the extra become window dressing, which is a nice touch. You can also make it to where you only need one glowie, but you can set up additional, non-clickable ones in the same area, provided you connect them to a front spawn that the player won't return to to activate the chain. Then you give them the clue, you keep the window dressing, and the mish moves on.
• Holy f***, a truck! HA! Right on top of me. FYI: The truck objective test is the same as the general text when it appears. I know I'm supposed to "Destroy Truck," but the text says "The Sound of a Truck" or something like that. Technically, it's a description and not an objective.
• Good dialogue, but don't put quotes around any of it. They're not quoting anyone, they're just talking.
• I didn't bother to check whether the prisoner's animation was "Wounded." If so, I'd use that for his captive and rescue animations. You can also use Dead Slab to have him fall down, then get back up upon rescue. If you wanted that.
• It's a long run back, and the map is empty. Consider throwing some patrols in after rescue is complete.
• Tb perfectly honest, if possible, I'd just have the poss pop in in the back, have me fight them, with the ally in tow. Then, after I beat them, just end mish there. Escorts aren't a favorite for most players, esp if the map is large, or the run is long, like this one. Seriously, it's a long run. 
• 
• By the way. I lead the guy out, without engaging Death Angel, and the mish completed.:-/ If you really want me to fight 'em, make it an objective.
• The various clues are great. Grist. Bone Guard. it's appropriately sinister.
• I'd avoid giving the PC too much dialogue in the clue text. It's a turn off for some players.  You can sorta work around this by saying, You put in a request for a teleport. AND a new, less brain-covered change of wardrobe when you get back.
• FYI: "Intel" is on l. I used to work in Army Intelligence. I know. Oxymoron and all that.:-)

Overall: It's a strong start, but I'd say there are some "must changes:"

• Fewer glowies. Maybe even only 1, if we're mainly just getting a clue with them. I'd work on "window dressing" the middle area, having the one active glowie.
• Boss fight: If you want me to fight them for sure, make them ab objective, then have them pop in with the Truck in the back (btw, that was GREAT--just this damned truck all of a sudden. It makes no sense how it got there, but it was great).:-)
• In conjunction with the above, remove the long escort. Keep the "Defeat Death Angel to Escape." Make the escort a non-combatant so they can't be targeted, then the mish will end when the boss dies, and it can be assumed I waltzed out of there.
• We really need a dossier on on SFA.  I'm still in the dark about who they are and why I'm working with them. World-building, yes. But where in the world do they fit in? If you want to keep things close to the vest, then maybe everything's just classified, and somehow I get drafted or something. I did read the contact text

 

I like the customs. I like the contact. I like the map and feel. I'd like more of that background to be foreground. (I'm hoping I didn't miss something when I read contact desc. Maybe SFA stuff was all in there?).

 

Pretty strong start. Tweak it a bit, then drive on, hombre!

 

Thanks for the tips. I am probably overthinking the immersive elements I am putting in, and trying too hard with the collection aspect in that regard.

 

I'll spend some time with it this weekend. As always, I really appreciate your help and the advice of others as I learn to tell stories using this medium.

 

~Paws

[raven9864]

Lojac's Brain/The Grave and the Old have been updated and (hopefully) refined in mechanics and story to provide a better experience.

 

As always, feedback and suggestions are always desired. (not a farm build)

 

~Paws

[Ankylosaur]

On 6/13/2023 at 6:18 PM, cranebump said:

Font color code is a menu option. You can highlight and select it

 

Yes, you can right click highlighted text to use Font Colors in contact text, mission intro/exit bubbles and clues - loads of places. Any standard HTML hexadecimal codes work, but some are more readable than others - even in the ones on the right click menu.

 

Explore to your Hearst content! (I tend to just used some of the named colors - lighter the better in most cases but not all)

https://htmlcolorcodes.com/

 

I have tried colors in dialog boxes and they worked with unpredictable results, meaning, sometimes without rhyme or reason, so I gave up on that.

[raven9864]

18 hours ago, Ankylosaur said:

 

Yes, you can right click highlighted text to use Font Colors in contact text, mission intro/exit bubbles and clues - loads of places. Any standard HTML hexadecimal codes work, but some are more readable than others - even in the ones on the right click menu.

 

Explore to your Hearst content! (I tend to just used some of the named colors - lighter the better in most cases but not all)

https://htmlcolorcodes.com/

 

I have tried colors in dialog boxes and they worked with unpredictable results, meaning, sometimes without rhyme or reason, so I gave up on that.

Thank you!

 

I've discovered the right click options, and have revised TGa/tO and Lojac's Brain with colored font options. In addition, I've tried to color code certain instances across all missions, such as yellow for drawing attention to text that should specifically be paid attention to, orange for faction/enemy group proper names, etc...

 

I'm hoping this will add a sense of continuity as well as being helpful for players who "speed read" or gloss over text in favor of the action.

 

I've been playing thru different non-farm missions in AE to get a sense of what others are doing and paying better attention to in-game missions that i have been running thru for literally decades in some instances. Someone posted about a discord group for AE missions that I intend to join as soon as I re-familiarize myself with discord.

 

I've implemented most of the advice you and others have given me. The reccomendation of an SFA dossier is being considered, but you are correct in that I believe there are some critical pieces of lore you missed in The Grave and the Old. Regardless, I have added a note to Lojac's Brain advising playing the other first, despite it being labled as a sequel.

 

Again, thank everyone for their insight and feedback. If you haven't tried these arcs out folks, please do so. As much fun as I have expressing my creativity, I would be more thrilled to have others enjoy them as well. If anyone wants me to try out a mission(s) that I havent yet, just send me a dm in game to @blackpaws. I'll try it as soon as I can and give feedback.

 

~Paws

Edited June 25, 2023 by raven9864

[raven9864]

So, when I'm not making AE missions, I'm also crafting bases. I have 2 1/2 and I'm the only player in any of them. Having said that, I actually have an SG and base for Strikeforce Alpha, the supergroup I've been using in my AE story arcs. Its a big ol place that's not being used, so I figured why not offer it as a reward of sorts for playing thru The Grave and the Old. I've added some text with the option of me adding your character to the SG if you would like at the end of mission 4. (Storage options will open up after a short vetting period) If you don't want to join but are still curious, the passcode is SFA-25519.

 

Maybe we can even get some RP going around it.

 

Enjoy.

 

~Paws

[raven9864]

Part 2 of Lojac's Brain is now published.

 

Lojac's Brain (Sequel to The Grave and the Old)

Part 2-Drums in the Deep

 

As always, your consideration, feedback, and enjoyment of this mission is welcomed, encouraged, and hoped for.

 

~Paws

[cranebump]

Giving it a run.

Spoiler

First this, from M1:

Looks like the truck is activated at the opening, which means it needs to be reset to spawn, if you still wanted it to appear after stations and box. 

 

This room:

So nicely done, from setting perspective. Well done. And all objectives are right there. Not sure we need 4, which would require getting fiddly with glowies to set one as objective, and others as window dressing. Would be hard to do, considering we have an escort, and window dressing requires non-required objectives spawning where the PC is not, so the player doesn't have to click). But this was great placement.

 

NOTE: Because the spawns changed, I accomplished things in reverse order. Truck, escort, box, then back to room to get stations. So I'd fix the spawn chain to force me to do this in the order you envision (I think?).

 

Text on stations would be better as "Placing teleport trigger..." rather than "You begin to," which is the begin text entry that would be in Green system text, rather than the interact bar. Cosmetic, but it's sorta "industry standard."

 

Station objective text: For multiple objects should be: ___ Bloody Medical Stations to tag for transport," and the last should be "Tag the last station."

 

Your Clues are excellent.

 

M2:

Nice add. I'd just drop the word What?, and have contact just give me the info as is. Or, new paragraph, and "Trust Fund? They're a..." In any case, this is great to know, and you don't have to deal with dropping a of additional info in your mish text now.

 

I'd sep this one big paragraph into smaller ones. The last one should start with What he has found out... 

 

Other stuff:

I'd have contact say Lojac's life depends on...And just let player click I'm ready. I'd also use less colored text here. Less you use, the more specifics stand out. You probably only need color-coding on Coinspinner and Trust Fund, tbh.

 

Oh, and this map is much better choice than the previous one. Not such a long hump out. Spawns generally worked out as intended. Just need to fix the first link in the chain.

 

Nav:

I like the use of Yellow Nav, and white details better than the all yellow of M1. For consistency's sake, I'd go with this, but either way, I'd make them uniform.

 

Objective text has a typo (slime), and could use some clarification:

4 slime-covered barrels to destroy (or to tag, gather, etc.). I wouldn't capitalize barrels.

 

Entry clue should be divided into paragraphs. Easier to digest smaller pieces.

 

Great info on Mud Troll text. Good use of enemy to deliver clue.

 

Critter label:

Should be singular (Muck Fiend). 

 

Out of your control, but check this out:

I just love it when this happens.:-/ I wish they'd debug this with allies/escorts.

 

Critter Haint has standard minion text. Might want to update?

 

Nav objective needs a verb:

Find Lojac's Brain (or Locate?)

 

Okay I defeat Void (who popped elude or something, so we had a nice dance for awhile). HOWEVER: there was only 1 Barrel, so the Nav needs to be updated, or other barrles added.

 

Dust in the Wind clue:

Missing an 'i' in "shufflike?" Or should it be "shuffling?"

 

Typo:

Bosom. With 2 s's it's pronounced like "blossom." Also, embracing her dark bosom? Void, you are such a flirt!:-)

 

NOTE: You could have Coinspinner say he has the location of the brain and shares it with player, so that, if he gets lost (or snagged, in my case), he wouldn't "have" to be along for the ride. His "stranded" text could then be, "You want me to stay here? Fine, then." or some such.

 

OVERALL: the usual tweaks here and there. But:

• Good customs and NPCs.
• Workable map choices.
• Void was a good boss. I've got a pretty well-developed incarnate running this, and had to get tricksy with him before taking him down. 

It's coming together, hombre.:-)

 

 

Edited July 10, 2023 by cranebump

[raven9864]

4 hours ago, cranebump said:

Giving it a run.

  Hide contents

 

It's coming together, hombre.:-)

 

 

Thanks a lot my friend! I'll look into tweaking very soon. Gotta work on RL(tm) transcriptions today.

[raven9864]

Tweaks and fixes applied to Missions 1 & 2.

 

Beginning work on Mission 3 (finale).

 

Password for Strikeforce Alpha's base is: SFA-25519. 

Anyone is welcome to visit and anyone that wants to actually join this SG is welcome to do so. Currently its just me and my alts.

 

I'll update in the near future with password entry for The Trust Fund AND The Death Knights!

 

As always, please give my missions a try and leave any commentary you like. Hit those stars and submit a comment!

 

~Paws

 

P.S.-if you have something you want me to try, just LMK. I'm trying to work in other creator's efforts into my gameplay as time allows.

[raven9864]

1. Part 3 of Lojac's Brain has now been published. This is the finale for the saga of Strikeforce Alpha for now, as I turn to other avenues of writing AE missions. I intend to expand on The Trust Fund and The Death Knights next.
2. As always, I would appreciate an and all feedback from my esteemed peers.
3. If you play all 3 missions, there is an ending option that I hope some of you will take advantage of.
4. During the course of writing Part 3, "Obsidian Oedipus", I also made some very minor tweaks to mission details for parts 1 & 2.

As always, if you have something you'd like me to run thru, just give the word.

 

As someone told me recently (please forgive me for not remembering exactly who) "AE is the real end game content".

 

I hope you enjoy "Lojac's Brain", the sequel to "The Grave and the Old".

 

TYIA

 

~Paws

[Clave Dark 5]

So, didn't take notes on the first sorry,but for the second:

 

Spoiler

M1

• Mission Into - the coloring on Vschone's name has missed the V (very niggling, yeah). 
• Send Off - "they'll assume the worst and have the sewers sanctioned..."  Sanctioned, like "off"?  Seems a little unclear, you may wish to revise, or you may wish to tell me to take a long walk off a short pier. 
• Send-Off Clues - I wouldn't have thought to set the stage via these like you do, it's a good idea.
• I love the interrupt for the medical stuff, "you drop the brain", ha ha!
• the whole thing's wonderfully gross, and I love the truck.

M2

• S'all good. 
• Good foe design again, I like this group of scary zomboids, wish now I'd run both of these missions with my stalker so I get up close to look without being attacked.

 

M3

• "Sanction All Enemy Combatants!"  There's that use of "sanction" again, hm...
• Anyway, I liked the weird tech item set as Mother and the counting down as her health declined too, that was clever usage of the mechanic.

Really enjoyed this one, it felt tighter and more focused, map use and all was great.  If I had one complaint, and this is subjective, I'd suggest trying to cut down on the clues and amount of words overall.  Your writing in them (and everywhere else) was great: evocative, atmospheric, direct, etc., but there was lots of it ha ha.  Some of the new dev missions 'suffer' this too, even though well written.  Again, just my two cents on that, it's no horrible failing, just a matter of taste. 

 

Again, this was fun, thanks!

 

 

[raven9864]

9 hours ago, Clave Dark 5 said:

So, didn't take notes on the first sorry,but for the second:

 

  Reveal hidden contents

M1

• Mission Into - the coloring on Vschone's name has missed the V (very niggling, yeah). 
• Send Off - "they'll assume the worst and have the sewers sanctioned..."  Sanctioned, like "off"?  Seems a little unclear, you may wish to revise, or you may wish to tell me to take a long walk off a short pier. 
• Send-Off Clues - I wouldn't have thought to set the stage via these like you do, it's a good idea.
• I love the interrupt for the medical stuff, "you drop the brain", ha ha!
• the whole thing's wonderfully gross, and I love the truck.

M2

• S'all good. 
• Good foe design again, I like this group of scary zomboids, wish now I'd run both of these missions with my stalker so I get up close to look without being attacked.

 

M3

• "Sanction All Enemy Combatants!"  There's that use of "sanction" again, hm...
• Anyway, I liked the weird tech item set as Mother and the counting down as her health declined too, that was clever usage of the mechanic.

Really enjoyed this one, it felt tighter and more focused, map use and all was great.  If I had one complaint, and this is subjective, I'd suggest trying to cut down on the clues and amount of words overall.  Your writing in them (and everywhere else) was great: evocative, atmospheric, direct, etc., but there was lots of it ha ha.  Some of the new dev missions 'suffer' this too, even though well written.  Again, just my two cents on that, it's no horrible failing, just a matter of taste. 

 

Again, this was fun, thanks!

 

 

 

Thank you for the kind words. I'm glad you enjoyed it.