How to scare away new players.

[Twisted Toon]

1 hour ago, PaxArcana said:

This is wrong on so very, very many levels.  Wrong, and deplorable.

Wrong as in, the information is incorrect, or wrong as in that the behavior is not acceptable?

 

I agree that the behavior is unacceptable.

2 hours ago, MunkiLord said:

The only difference between now and any point in the past is with the internet it is easier to express offense. That's it. People were every bit as offended at every point in history, but lacked the tools to share it with any significant amount of people.

Actually, I disagree with a portion of this. People had all the tools they needed to express their offense decades ago. They just lacked the desire to work to express their offense. Others took an  easy tool. Unfortunately, it didn't end well for them. Although, the news did give them their 15 minutes (now it would be about a week) of fame.

[PaxArcana]

3 hours ago, Twisted Toon said:

Wrong as in, the information is incorrect, or wrong as in that the behavior is not acceptable?

Your abhorrently condescending attitude towards people presumably younger than yourself is what is wrong.

 

3 hours ago, Twisted Toon said:

People had all the tools they needed to express their offense decades ago.

To an audience that was inherently smaller.

 

Forty years ago, your typical person could not communicate their thoughts, good or ill, to a community numbering in the tens of thousands, perhaps even the millions.

 

And yet, here we are.  Right here, on this forum.  That has (as of this writing) 144,535 members.

 

And, as MMO communities go, that's a pretty small forum.  How many people might be reading, say, the World of Warcraft forums over the course of any single week, do you think?

[Sanguinesun]

3 hours ago, PaxArcana said:

Your abhorrently condescending attitude towards people presumably younger than yourself is what is wrong.

 

To an audience that was inherently smaller.

 

Forty years ago, your typical person could not communicate their thoughts, good or ill, to a community numbering in the tens of thousands, perhaps even the millions.

 

And yet, here we are.  Right here, on this forum.  That has (as of this writing) 144,535 members.

 

And, as MMO communities go, that's a pretty small forum.  How many people might be reading, say, the World of Warcraft forums over the course of any single week, do you think?

 

Actually, one could cite the forums of then were the "Letter's and Comments to the Editor" published daily by any small or large news paper. Radio talk show call in commentaries too but yes the ease/speed we have now is much more pronounced to be sure.

[Neiska]

@OP -I am a new player as well and I can say is that I have had an overwhelmingly positive experience. Yes, I have had a few bumps with other players, but I consider those to be rare. 99% of the time, players have been friendly, helpful, and eager to have fun as well.

 

1. The forums and wiki has both been very helpful. The scope of the game can be intimidating at first, as well as a lot of the gameplay or mechanics just aren't common knowledge such as caps and things. But with a little research you can look things up, and people both ingame and on the forums have been helpful with questions and explaining things. I usually try to find the answers myself before posting or asking the help channel, but when I do I've pretty much always gotten an answer. The game is old, but thats in no way a bad thing. I am still finding out something new pretty much every day even after a month of playing. 

 

2. One thing I have learned is this game is pretty open to "play your way", which can be both good and bad, depending on the sort of player. This much freedom might be new to some players. And some people like having the freedom to do whatever they like, and others like having a roadmap/step by step process to high levels. Both ways are fine! Some players like having an endgame goal to strive for, and thats fine too! Personally I do my own thing, and let other people do theirs. 

 

3. Players here can be both passionate and opinionated, which I see as a good thing because it means they care about the game itself. Sure some peoples messages could be presented better, but most of communication is actually nonverbal - tone of voice, body posture, so on. Online you miss those cues. So its hard to tell if people are using passive voice, being snarky, or just messing around. Or if they really are just being mean. Myself I take most things with a grain of salt, because unless I desire someones opinion on something then good or bad it really doesnt affect me either way. But thats just what works for me.

 

4. You are going to find rude people everywhere, both online and in real life. Its pretty much unavoidable. But I do think our community is far better than some others out there, such as Wow, Diablo, CT, and so on. I haven't really seen much ingame trolling and that sort of thing in 2 months of playing. Sure there has been a few bumps, but thats only to be expected. But the positive experiences vastly outnumber the bad ones, and thats what keeps me logging in every day after work.

 

I just pretty much do my own thing and play the game my way. I may do missions, or farms, or whatever. Whatever I am in the mood for. Fun and enjoyment is my main motovator, moreso than having the most mathmatically effecient build, or the most statistically strong character. Some people like the number crunch game, I get it. And thats great! Because its usually those folks who are on the cutting edge of game mechanics, knowledge and even undocumented effects and so on.

 

Just my thoughts on things as a fairly new player! Thanks for reading!

[PaxArcana]

5 hours ago, Sanguinesun said:

 

Actually, one could cite the forums of then were the "Letter's and Comments to the Editor" published daily by any small or large news paper. Radio talk show call in commentaries too but yes the ease/speed we have now is much more pronounced to be sure.

No, not really.  I've written "letters to the editor" before (and had them printed in the paper), you see, and learned two things:

• Most of them never get published.  The larger the paper's circulation, the less likely you will ever see your letter in print.
• Even when they do, they are often HEAVILY edited, and while the core message is usually not altered, the tone likely will be, and there may be a LOT of pruning.

Whereas, on the internet?  Unless you break the rules ... your words, all of them, absolutely will be what show up in that forum.  Or on that social media platform.  Etc.

 

🙂

 

[Prototech]

There should be no requirement for a normal individual to constantly worry about thin skinned and frail people. The level of sensitivity in this thread is almost nauseating. 

 

And there's the irony too of going after people that offend you with far stronger language and aggression than they used... It's like any perceived offense permits limitless retaliation. The game is then to act flawless until an affront is found then freely unleash without reservation. I mean I try to be mindful, I really do, but the weak will be meek and no amount of bending the knee will really help. I hope all of you can grow into more rounded people and maybe try to pick a fight in the real world instead, that high will hopefully mellow you out for harmless online forums so the rest of us don't have to worry about causing PTSD or mental collapses when just chatting away like normal humans.

 

This is not directed at anyone in particular, too many cry babies in this thread blending together.

[Twisted Toon]

9 hours ago, PaxArcana said:

Your abhorrently condescending attitude towards people presumably younger than yourself is what is wrong.

 

To an audience that was inherently smaller.

 

Forty years ago, your typical person could not communicate their thoughts, good or ill, to a community numbering in the tens of thousands, perhaps even the millions.

 

And yet, here we are.  Right here, on this forum.  That has (as of this writing) 144,535 members.

 

And, as MMO communities go, that's a pretty small forum.  How many people might be reading, say, the World of Warcraft forums over the course of any single week, do you think?

The typical person could communicate their thoughts to a great many people forty years ago. What limited them was the amount of effort they wanted to expend being heard. Unless you're wanting to say that people like Martin Luther King Jr. were born exceptional. They weren't. They were normal people who took extra effort to get their message heard. There are many examples of typical people who got their message heard by the entire country if not farther. Most of those people took a darker path to get that message heard.

 

Yes, it is easier now to get a message across the entire world. It's also faster and easier to travel across the country. Doesn't mean that people couldn't do it 100 years ago.

 

I can see that we are just going to have to agree to disagree here. You're not going to change my mind, and I am not going to change yours. We both have years of experience to back up our own views. In essence, we're just whistling in the wind.

[PaxArcana]

26 minutes ago, Twisted Toon said:

The typical person could communicate their thoughts to a great many people forty years ago. What limited them was the amount of effort they wanted to expend being heard. Unless you're wanting to say that people like Martin Luther King Jr. were born exceptional. They weren't. They were normal people who took extra effort to get their message heard. There are many examples of typical people who got their message heard by the entire country if not farther. Most of those people took a darker path to get that message heard.

That actually proves my point, TT.

 

MLK wasn't born exceptional, no.  But by the time his message was being heard by the entire nation, he had BECOME exceptional.

 

The only difference between then and now, is that now even the ordinary for all their lives people have larger audiences.  It is no longer the sole domain of the extraordinary to be able to share their message far and wide - whether the exceptional or extraordinary facet is luck, effort, wealth, or whatever ... it's no longer needed.  Every random Joe or Jane Q. Citizen has access to platforms that reach millions, even _billions_, of people.

30 minutes ago, Twisted Toon said:

Yes, it is easier now to get a message across the entire world.

And that is my point.  The bar for entry is much lower now, than it was 100, 50, or even just 30 years ago.  Anyone can have a voice that gets heard by millions.

 

And that's where your error lays, TT.  You think you're hearing more voices, because they all just want attention and don't really have any true complaint.

 

The truth is, EVEN MLK "just wanted attention", when you boil it down to the simplest factors.  He wanted it for a damned fine reason, but, most of his efforts in the civil rights movement were to get attention.

 

So what's really going on, is: you are hearing more voices, because more people have access to the means to get their voice heard. End of reason.

[PaxArcana]

56 minutes ago, Prototech said:

There should be no requirement for a normal individual to constantly worry about thin skinned and frail people. The level of sensitivity in this thread is almost nauseating.

It's not about being "frail" or "thin skinned".

 

It's about wanting to be treated with (un)common courtesy.

 

But thank you for demonstrating what a complete shitlord some people are.

[Prototech]

4 minutes ago, PaxArcana said:

It's not about being "frail" or "thin skinned".

 

It's about wanting to be treated with (un)common courtesy.

 

But thank you for demonstrating what a complete shitlord some people are.

Thanks for proving my point so perfectly.

[Insomm]

On 9/25/2019 at 7:41 PM, DSorrow said:

While I understand sometimes small things compound in the short term and cause everything to be seemingly annoying

For the people that do get offended/triggered over something, this is often what it comes down to.

Someone stumbles on you on accident once, they might say they are sorry and move on, you ignore it.
A second person stumbles on you on accident, and say they are sorry, you ignore it.
By the tenth time in a day, it might become too much to ignore.
Even though each and every person apologized (assuming they did), that doesn't change the fact that it did in fact happen in the first place.
This stumble vs kick analogy is a little bit hard to work on, but I think it still can make a point.

To everyone who thinks they are thick skinned:
Think back on situations on your life and wonder if there was never a situation where you wound up belittling someone due to frustration with something else.
A salesman, a waiter, someone younger than you, someone on the internet... A family member?
I guarantee at some point in your life you have.

Many of the people that get offended/triggered by something do so due to repeated interactions, not a single one.
That isn't to say this is always the case.

No matter how thick/thin skinned you are, if something happens enough times, it will eventually get to you.

1 hour ago, Prototech said:

There should be no requirement for a normal individual to constantly worry about thin skinned and frail people. The level of sensitivity in this thread is almost nauseating. 

 

And there's the irony too of going after people that offend you with far stronger language and aggression than they used... It's like any perceived offense permits limitless retaliation.

While I agree someone should not have to go about their day constantly worrying about how "thin skinned/frail people" around them are feeling, people should take the time to understand that sometimes it isn't just a single action that gets to these people.

Empathy is a strong and important word. Belittling a group of people will never get you anywhere. Try instead to understand why they are in the situation they are.
It might turn out that it is indeed someone just blowing something completely out of proportion. But it might also turn out that they are just fed up, and you might have been too if you had been through what they were.

As for the retaliation thing. I think that happens too often nowadays, and I hate it. (maybe it did in the past as well, but I think I never paid attention to it)
Two wrongs will never make a right.
But then again, maybe it was just the last straw for that one person, so it is always hard to gauge.

On 9/25/2019 at 5:48 PM, jubakumbi said:

IMO, the endless attacks on people on the forums and in the game over peoples 'triggers' is a huge turn off to new players, when said 'triggers' are literally a normal part of the game.

This is exactly it.

When it comes to the subject of the game, rather than some complex social interaction discussion, this is what it comes down to.

If anything in the game brings you to argue/discuss/judge/belittle other players, you will drive players away.
Sometimes from you, other times from the game itself. When there is a large enough part of the community that has this similar thought process (the case of the original chat interaction), the latter is more common than the former.
 

6 hours ago, Neiska said:

@OP -I am a new player as well and I can say is that I have had an overwhelmingly positive experience. Yes, I have had a few bumps with other players, but I consider those to be rare. 99% of the time, players have been friendly, helpful, and eager to have fun as well.

Hey, I am glad to hear your experience has been overwhelmingly positive, and so has mine! 😊

Still, I don't think how much positivity there was excuses mindsets that affect the game or players negatively.

Like you said in your fourth point, there are always rude people. That is fine, we can't do anything about it.
It is one thing when you encounter a few of these people here and there, but another thing when a core part of the game brings out multiples of these.
No subject that is part of a game should bring up a large group of rude people and be left unmentioned and unnoticed.

At the end of the day, this was just one drop in a large bucket. It was not the first, and won't be the last.

 

Edited September 26, 2019 by Insomm
Edit: spelling/grammar

[Prototech]

6 minutes ago, Insomm said:

For the people that do get offended/triggered over something, this is often what it comes down to.

Someone stumbles on you on accident once, they might say they are sorry and move on, you ignore it.
A second person stumbles on you on accident, and say they are sorry, you ignore it.
By the tenth time in a day, it might become too much to ignore.
Even though each and every person apologized (assuming they did), that doesn't change the fact that it did in fact happen in the first place.
This stumble vs kick analogy is a little bit hard to work on, but I think it still can make a point.

To everyone who thinks they are thick skinned:
Think back on situations on your life and wonder if there was never a situation where you wound up belittling someone due to frustration with something else.
A salesman, a waiter, someone younger than you, someone on the internet... A family member?
I guarantee at some point in your life you have.

Many of the people that get offended/triggered by something do so due to repeated interactions, not a single one.
That isn't to say this is always the case.

No matter how thick/thin skinned you are, if something happens enough times, it will eventually get to you.

While I agree someone should not have to go about their day constantly worrying about how "thin skinned/frail people" around them are feeling, people should take the time to understand that sometimes it isn't just a single action that gets to these people.

Empathy is a strong and important word. Belittling a group of people will never get you anywhere. Try instead to understand why they are in the situation they are.
It might turn out that it is indeed someone just blowing something completely out of proportion. But it might also turn out that they are just fed up, and you might have been too if you had been through what they were.

As for the retaliation thing. I think that happens too often nowadays, and I hate it. (maybe it did in the past as well, but I think I never paid attention to it)
Two wrongs will never make a right.
But then again, maybe it was just the last straw for that one person, so it is always hard to gauge.

This is exactly it.

When it comes to the subject of the game, rather than some complex social interaction discussion, this is what it comes down to.

If anything in the game brings you to argue/discuss/judge/belittle other players, you will drive players away.
Sometimes from you, other times from the game itself. When there is a large enough part of the community that has this similar thought process (the case of the original chat interaction), the latter is more common than the former.
 

Hey, I am glad to hear your experience has been overwhelmingly positive, and so has mine! 😊

Still, I don't think how much positivity there was excuses mindsets that affect the game or players negatively.

Like you said in your fourth point, there are always rude people. That is fine, we can't do anything about it.
It is one thing when you encounter a few of these people here and there, but another thing when a core part of the game brings out multiples of these.
No subject that is part of a game should bring up a large group of rude people and be left unmentioned and unnoticed.

At the end of the day, this was just one drop in a large bucket. It was not the first, and won't be the last.

 

You're overthinking it and giving them too much credit. We can all try to do better and be more considerate, that's a given. What we have here is often incredibly rude and entitled people pretending to be victims so they can get away with nonsense must of us wouldn't ever engage in. 

 

You're also wrong about what makes someone thick skinned. It's precisely because I HAVE gone through a lot that I'm thick skinned. The internet is full of people who could not survive the harshness of the real world so they demand special consideration online. I sympathize and try to be more considerate as a default, but it doesn't mean we need to let them play the bully in turn for some kind of 'balance'.

 

 

[Insomm]

24 minutes ago, Prototech said:

You're overthinking it and giving them too much credit. We can all try to do better and be more considerate, that's a given. What we have here is often incredibly rude and entitled people pretending to be victims so they can get away with nonsense must of us wouldn't ever engage in. 

 

You're also wrong about what makes someone thick skinned. It's precisely because I HAVE gone through a lot that I'm thick skinned. The internet is full of people who could not survive the harshness of the real world so they demand special consideration online. I sympathize and try to be more considerate as a default, but it doesn't mean we need to let them play the bully in turn for some kind of 'balance'.

Sorry, I didn't mean to imply you have not been through your own things, But going through one situation doesn't "thicken" your skin for all situations.

Although I don't agree with everything PaxArcana has said, this one line speaks very truly against many of the points that have been made about people getting offended:

On 9/23/2019 at 12:25 AM, PaxArcana said:

OTOH, just as everyone has their kryptonite ... everyone has their hotbutton issue they just can't walk away from.  Some of us have more than one.

Just because someone gets affected by something you do not (or the other way around), doesn't make them any "weaker" or "stronger."
Much less mean that they cannot survive "the real world." In fact, all of those people do survive the real world.

It just turns out the things that bother these people are not the same things that might bother you.
In fact, the thing that bothers you might be people getting bothered!
I don't know you, but it could very well be.

Everyone has been through their own things, and in the internet we never know what those things were.

While we can voice our opinions, that is all they are. Opinions. Specific to our situation, whereas we are talking with people from all sorts of different cultures and backgrounds.
No one will be objectively right or wrong, specially given the fact we have no idea where their ideals come from in the first place.

At the end of the day, it doesn't matter what you or I think, or anyone else for that matter;
Arguing social constructs in the internet is a moot point, and we will never come to a universal agreement on this.

Although this has spiraled into a large social opinion discussion, that was not the point of the post.
The point was to talk about a mentality when it comes to certain aspects of the game.

That is not to say we can't talk about opinions and social constructs, but expecting a mutual understanding and a good outcome from this on the internet is just silly.

Edited September 26, 2019 by Insomm
Edit: spelling... I'm tired :(

[Skyhawke]

I think the Arena needs to be used more often. Don't like what someone said?  Feel like lashing out in a chat channel?  Challenge them to the arena and settle it old school. MORTAL KOMBAAAAAAT! (Insert movie theme song here)

[Leogunner]

Reading the OP, I have no sympathy. 

 

Granted the guy you chatted with may not have been the nicest but you just lable them a "bad apple" and then dismiss his points? That's fine but it's exactly why I have no sympathy for this story and gives me a chuckle reading all the replies rushing in support. 

 

Maybe I'm insane but I don't think you need a COMPLETED farming build to farm with it. Difficulty sliders exist... 

[ShardWarrior]

20 minutes ago, Skyhawke said:

I think the Arena needs to be used more often. Don't like what someone said?  Feel like lashing out in a chat channel?  Challenge them to the arena and settle it old school. MORTAL KOMBAAAAAAT! (Insert movie theme song here)

And this has the added bonus of getting some Arena badges too! 😀

[jubakumbi]

6 minutes ago, Insomm said:

At the end of the day, it doesn't matter what you or I think, or anyone else for that matter;
Arguing social constructs in the internet is a moot point, and we will never come to a universal agreement on this.

Although this has spiraled into a large social opinion discussion, that was not the point of the post.
The point was to talk about a mentality when it comes to certain aspects of the game.

That is not to say we can't talk about opinions and social constructs, but expecting a mutual understanding and a good outcome from this on the internet is just silly.

My only issue is when people use thier emotional situation as a weapon, as seen over and over on these forums, and then be allowed to insult and demean because 'feelings', in total disregard for other people, because some unseen 'trigger line' was crossed.

 

We ALL have shit to dealth with, it's called life.

 

The moment anyone tries to use thier own emotional outlook as a weapon to beat down others as the bad guys, they have eliminated any empathy or sympathy they might get from me, especially if the only thing backing up thier argument is feelings and not facts.

 

IME, most humans are just plain old too scared of challenging these attacks, because they then feel like they will be seen as being mean to a 'vulnerable' person, while said person my be 'vulnerable', using it as a weapon means they gave up thier good will, IMO.

 

As far as this game goes, for whatever reason (I think there are many) IMO, more of us are 'on the spectrum' as compared to other games.

Makes for a very interesting 'community' if nothing else.

 

All I really ever want is for people to not be purposefully mean to each other in game, which some people are simply incapable of doing, that is reality.

I also follow the wise words of Mal in my own way - "If someone tries to kill you, you try and kill them right back." - I will not 'roll over and take it', I will no longer 'turn the other cheek' or any of that nonsense - I will clap back in the spririt in which I am addressed, and yes that includes when I have bad data or I misinterpret something, I am human, I make misakes, imagine that!

 

If any of that makes me a 'bad' person to someone else, I can live with that, will not be the first time, won't be the last, and will give me another good story for my boss and other non-gamers for whom I give glimps into our world. 🙂

 

[Prototech]

7 minutes ago, Insomm said:

Sorry, I didn't mean to imply you have not been through your own things, But going through one situation doesn't "thicken" your skin for all situations.

Although I don't agree with everything PaxArcana has said, this one line speaks very truly against many of the points that have been made about people getting offended:

Just because someone gets affected by something you do not (or the other way around), doesn't make them any "weaker" or "stronger."
Much less mean that they cannot survive "the real world." In fact, all of those people do survive the real world.

It just turns out the things that bother these people are not the same things that might bother you.
In fact, the thing that bothers you might be people getting bothered!
I don't know you, but it could very well be.

Everyone has been through their own things, and in the internet we never know what those things were.

While we can voice our opinions, that is all they are. Opinions. Specific to our situation, whereas we are talking with people from all sorts of different cultures and backgrounds.
No one will be objectively right or wrong, specially given the fact we have no idea where their ideals come from in the first place.

At the end of the day, it doesn't matter what you or I think, or anyone else for that matter;
Arguing social constructs in the internet is a moot point, and we will never come to a universal agreement on this.

Although this has spiraled into a large social opinion discussion, that was not the point of the post.
The point was to talk about a mentality when it comes to certain aspects of the game.

That is not to say we can't talk about opinions and social constructs, but expecting a mutual understanding and a good outcome from this on the internet is just silly.

You're a bit of a hippie but I appreciate you. I don't disagree as much as you may think.

 

 

[jubakumbi]

Just now, Prototech said:

You're a bit of a hippie but I appreciate you. ...

You say that like it's a bad thing!

I have been a damn (not dirty) hippie all my life.

Love Rules, Man!

[Abraxus]

Absolute bottom line...the world is not a perfect place, and is typically made even less so by it's (supposedly) most intelligent/sentient occupants.  All we can do is deal the best way we can, without making our issues, and concerns more important than the next guys.  We will disagree, debate, even argue.  But, try not to make it personal.  If we are doing that, it's about as good as it will get, on the whole.

[Prototech]

11 minutes ago, jubakumbi said:

You say that like it's a bad thing!

I have been a damn (not dirty) hippie all my life.

Love Rules, Man!

Haha, when I call someone a hippie it's all about how they are super kind and chill but kinda to the point where there is nothing there. It's like everything is so equal nothing matters and like why even talk about it. So not a bad thing honestly I say it mostly as a compliment.

[PaxArcana]

1 hour ago, Prototech said:

Thanks for proving my point so perfectly.

So, anything that isn't agreement or obsequiousness, is "being frail or thin-skinned", now?  🙄

[jubakumbi]

Just now, Prototech said:

Haha, when I call someone a hippie it's all about how they are super kind and chill but kinda to the point where there is nothing there. It's like everything is so equal nothing matters and like why even talk about it. So not a bad thing honestly I say it mostly as a compliment.

I knew you meant it well!

Was just playin', as I think you realized.

 

Damn, now I miss fighting with people in the South where I grew up over being a damn dirty hippie...

[Prototech]

1 minute ago, PaxArcana said:

So, anything that isn't agreement or obsequiousness, is "being frail or thin-skinned", now?  🙄

Not at all. You took offense at my post, presumably because it lacked 'common curtesy', and called me a shit lord. So you proved that people overreact easily then proceed, in glorious irony, to be way ruder in their replies, that was my point.

[TheOtherTed]

55 minutes ago, Insomm said:

Although this has spiraled into a large social opinion discussion, that was not the point of the post.
The point was to talk about a mentality when it comes to certain aspects of the game.

Speaking of that, and speaking of personal history/experience, I'll throw it out there that the mentality of the person you encountered (and perhaps other, similar, people) does have some history behind it.  You said in your initial post that you didn't have a chance to play back in the day, so there's no reason I or anyone else could expect you to know the history.  I'll give a quick recap here (as I understand it); maybe it will help see where "the other guy" was coming from.

 

In 2009, "Mission Architect" was introduced.  This allowed players to create their own content.  Sounds good, right?  Unfortunately, there were two issues.  First, some players quickly made powerlevelling maps.  Second, the Architect Entertainment buildings, where player-made content could be accessed, were placed in the starting zones.  Problem one, by itself, wouldn't have been much of a problem - powerlevelling was going on in high level zones anyway.  Problem two, however, meant that many new players would join AE powerlevelling teams - and would never play anything else.  The term "AE babies" was coined to describe players who got to level 50 very quickly, but had no real idea how the game worked, what their powers did, or other basic information.

 

How extensive that was, I honestly have no idea.  I just remember that nearly every zone, including starting zones, seemed devoid of life for a few months after Mission Architect was released.  Regardless of whatever "really" happened, the legend of the AE baby had been born.

 

When I read the initial part of the chat in your OP, I didn't blink an eye - I knew that history, and I probably would have been inclined to think similarly had I seen your request for help.  Does the history justify the assumption, either on his part or mine?  No, of course not.  But the history is there regardless, and flavors our "first impressions" whether we want it to or not.

 

More generally speaking, it took me a long time to realize how diverse individual histories and points-of-view could be - but when I finally started to "get it," it changed my outlook on a lot of interactions.  Nowadays, if I hear someone say something that's a bit "off," my first reaction is usually not to call the speaker a jarkarse or moron or other bad word (usually), but to tilt my head and say "Why do you say that?"

 

But, yes, I have my thresholds.  Ironically, one of them is when I make a statement that I think is relatively safe or innocent, and someone calls me a jarkarse, or moron, or other bad word,  It's not necessary, it's not helpful, and it tells me the person would rather draw a line in the sand rather than actually discuss.

Edited September 26, 2019 by TheOtherTed
Some clarification