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The Vanguard Security Officer gets no respect.


Jeneki
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Vanguard Security Officer: "No further without proper clearance. Let's see some ID."

 

Meanwhile, every hero on the way to the RWZ raid just breezes right by him without so much as slowing down. He politely stares and smiles, while keeping his inner rage suppressed.  He's a future supervillain in the making.

 

To quell this future threat before it takes root, I propose we all bring him cookies and show him phone pictures of our cats before heading off to the next raid.

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He knows his role there is just performative security, like taking off your shoes at the airport.  Mainly he's just there to intimidate all the civvies from going inside.

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Yeah, but the thing is...he says it on the way out, too. Like you'll never be good enough for him.

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9 hours ago, Jeneki said:

Vanguard Security Officer: "No further without proper clearance. Let's see some ID."

 

Meanwhile, every hero on the way to the RWZ raid just breezes right by him without so much as slowing down. He politely stares and smiles, while keeping his inner rage suppressed.  He's a future supervillain in the making.

 

To quell this future threat before it takes root, I propose we all bring him cookies and show him phone pictures of our cats before heading off to the next raid.

 

 

Psst.  He's already a villain.  I converted him a long time ago. :P

 

He does need an update though.  His mothership security briefing still mentions that there are eighteen pylons outside.  Poor guy still doesn't know that there are now twenty.

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He also identifies you on sight, negating the need for ID in the first place.  "Hold on, Tootboy, no further without some ID." 

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Those of you who continue to profess a belief in the Users will receive the standard substandard training which will result in your eventual elimination.

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2 hours ago, roleki said:

He also identifies you on sight, negating the need for ID in the first place.  "Hold on, Tootboy, no further without some ID." 


Working with stuff in the Navy that I can neither-confirm-nor-deny the existence of, I've said exactly that to shipmates...  "Hey, $GUY_I'VE_KNOWN_FOR_THREE_YEARS, show me your ID".

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58 minutes ago, Doc_Scorpion said:


Working with stuff in the Navy that I can neither-confirm-nor-deny the existence of, I've said exactly that to shipmates...  "Hey, $GUY_I'VE_KNOWN_FOR_THREE_YEARS, show me your ID".

I mean, he's going his job, I guess.  There's a bit of Security Protocol Theatre going on here, though.  At higher levels, a hero or villain is:

 

1) Easily recognizable.

2) Powerful enough to easily restrain the guard and enter before the guard could even sound an alarm.

3) In many cases, may have mind control and/or illusion powers that can "create" an ID or make the guard think that the hero/villain has a valid ID.

 

Of course, it's a comic book setting, so we can just go with it.  Also, it provides an opportunity to RP humorous exchanges with the guard...

 

Ralph, you do this every day- don't you recognize me by now?

Piss off Ralph, I outrank you.

Ralph Williby, don't you get bossy with me.  I was changing your nappies when your parents were still privates in Longbow!

 

And so on.  😛

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24 minutes ago, Grindingsucks said:

Ralph, you do this every day- don't you recognize me by now?

Piss off Ralph, I outrank you.

Ralph Williby, don't you get bossy with me.  I was changing your nappies when your parents were still privates in Longbow!


Morning Ralph
Mornin' Sam
 

 

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13 hours ago, Jeneki said:

 

To quell this future threat before it takes root, I propose we all bring him cookies and show him phone pictures of our cats before heading off to the next raid.

How do you know he'll accept cookies? He may be gluten intolerant or on a sugar-free, wheat-free diet.  

 

I suggest pollen-free flowers instead, and maybe a good audiobook on investing on a guard's salary.

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