Do you give unsolicited advice?

[arcane]

51 minutes ago, Without_Pause said:

Only in the case of if a player is really struggling and even then that's a maybe. There are people on this forum who actively admit to making subpar builds. 

Well, if they’re complaining that their powersets suck or something like that and acting all hopeless, that’s sort of implicitly soliciting someone to correct them, yeah.

[Rishidian]

I don't offer unsolicited advice.  Mostly because my advice isn't worth the electrons to post it.

 

I will answer questions, especially if people are having a private conversation in General Chat.  I figure if it's personal, they can, and should, create a private chat channel.  I mean, should they be discussing the physical qualities of a Stone Defender in the bedroom?  Of if Zap should be used to charge certain massage tools?

 

I'm still trying to figure out why my comments will have a chilling effect on their conversation.  I'm not rude, using offensive language, or even being insulting.  It's more of a 'Is this the best place to have this conversation' kind of thing.  Usually, the chat goes quiet once I stick my nose in, and rarely do I get invited to the conversation.  I can't figure out why...

[Chrono-Bot]

Had a guy give (politely) advice I change one of my characters from Warrior to an Outcast (or was it the other way around....? I have a lot of both for the same reason) for canon reasons and I was faced with the crossroad of doing like, a super intense 'LET ME TELL YOU MY CANON INFERENCES FROM THE WINCOTT AND FLUX ARCS!!!' enthusiasm and uhhh just telling him the short version that I appreciated the advice but this was a supergroup story thing. 

 

So advice givers beware! You may end up with story info dump on you from someone who just wants to share with SOMEONE!

 

I did the second because I won that dance with the devil that day. He said something like 'cool, got it'

[Sovera]

All the time. Sometimes people don't even know how something is bad, undertuned, or that they are missing a synergy.

 

But once having told them and if they insist it is what they want then I give them the 👍

[Ironblade]

14 hours ago, blue4333 said:

I was wondering if it was considered okay to give advice on power choices? I saw a Mastermind without their pet upgrade powers and I was going to /tell and give them a headsup but I didn't.

 

Is there a right place and right time to give unsolicited advice or is it a bad idea in general?

I would never give advice on someones power choices, slotting, set bonuses, etc unless specifically asked.

 

Pretty much the only time I would give unsolicited advice is if someone is on a team and does something genuinely stupid that gets OTHER people killed.  If they get themselves killed, I consider that a learning experience.  If they get others killed, they're messing up other peoples fun so I'll say something.

[MTeague]

Personally,, never.  If someone has things I consider sub-optimal, I assume it's for theme / character concept and it's entirely not my place to tell them that they're doing it wrong. (even if, maybe they are). 

 

That said, if they give me an opening ("Why am I so squishy!?", "Why am I running out of END so fast?", etc), I may chime in on a few suggestions.  I try not to overdue it though. I can be overly verbose on a good day, and no one wants to read six paragraphs of tells to a random perhaps-rhetorical question.

Edited February 4, 2022 by MTeague

[Saikochoro]

Never in game. If someone wants advice they can ask for it.
 

I will look at people infos on a team just to see what powersets they are running so I can observe them in game. This provides me a lot of inspiration for new alts, but I never comment on their power choices or lack IOs or anything. At most I will say, “how have you been like seismic blast?”

[Placta]

One time I noted a fellow badger didn't have Avid Reader and told them about Prometheus. They were grateful for that.

 

But builds? Nah.

[Greycat]

Pretty much the only time I give unsolicited anything is -

"nice costume/nice bio/love the name" and/or occasionally dropping super/winter packs, purples, ATOs, etc. on people.

 

Now, if I walk by and someone's complaining about always running out of END or something, I might - I'd consider that "semi-solicited." But most things like that tend to be in a help channel or actually posed as questions. But just "Hey, you should be running XYZ" or something.... no.

[KC4800]

I might ask why they skipped power X or power Y, but don't just tell someone they need to take it. And I never ask about taunt or tell them they need it. I look around peoples descriptions for back story, and see how much money they've spent on their builds by how huge their set bonus list is.

[merrypessimist]

I used to but these days pretty much the only unsolicited tells I make are things like "you have a typo in your bio, [what it is]" or "That bio made me laugh"

[Tahliah]

Yeah, no.  I have been on the receiving end of UA from a random player back on live (not on HC so far), and it's insulting as hell and way out of line.  Why do you have Ice Sword and not Frozen Fists (or whatever that power's called)? Frozen Fists is way betterer, and you should have it.  In fact, you should have both so you can do better in melee . . . on your range toon, because I play a blapper and you should, too.  Blah blah blah.  I don't think I even answered the person and was very happy when that ITF ended and I never had to deal with that person again.  Yes, I actually remember the exact tf we were on, though I can't recall the specific complaint about my build, though it was pretty much this ridiculous; this was back when the ITF was first introduced so everyone and their brother was running them over and over trying to figure out how best to beat it (remember when we puzzled and struggled over separating and defeating the Nictus one at a time?  LOL, good times!).

 

Anyway, even if you roll the best MM in the entire Paragonverse, keep your opinions to yourself unless explicitly asked.  And people will ask if they see you are running a great AT build well.  This, I get much more of, than that one time at ITF camp when I got hey, your build sucks because at level 35, you don't have the powers I would have selected at level 35. 

 

This is pretty much a good rule for your life, too, because no matter how well-intentioned, offering UA is always a bad idea.  It alienates people, makes them double down on whatever stupid you think you are pointing out, and generally makes you seem like a busybody know-it-all. (See what I did there?  How's that UA working out for ya? 😉)

[Tahliah]

On 2/3/2022 at 7:55 AM, SeraphimKensai said:

Otherwise I have my individual pet peeves, like anyone and the biggest ones I have in the game comes into play when I'm forming a Speed TF or a max difficulty TF, if you don't know the minimum level or how to get there, or if you're not going to assist with the ABCO's, then don't waste your and my time, I do not want to be your mule for XP/influence/merits, you can put your big boy pants on and manage your own character on your time.

 

That said I also often run fairly casual TFs and such as well where I have no problem putting on my Coach Costume and holding someone's hand through a TF, as I understand that there are still new people coming to the game. I might give you a few wiki links for the TF so you can read through or tell you about any weird mechanics so you get the jist of them.

 

I don't think this is necessarily a bad philosophy, though it's presented kind of matter of factly.  I mean a speed (not so much a max diff) TF requires that the player know the ropes because they have to know where to go and what to skip, etc.  But yeah, on an all or almost all PUG tf, I'm happy to help players (to the point that I've literally gone with them to NW to get the badge for an ITF).  Being nice is not only nice but it's pretty karmic.  I can't tell you how many times people have dropped what they were doing to help me out just because years earlier I had gone out of my way to help them and now they are some kind of uber player who is happy to help me when I need it. 

[Tahliah]

On 2/3/2022 at 12:49 PM, Rishidian said:

I'm still trying to figure out why my comments will have a chilling effect on their conversation.  I'm not rude, using offensive language, or even being insulting.  It's more of a 'Is this the best place to have this conversation' kind of thing.  Usually, the chat goes quiet once I stick my nose in, and rarely do I get invited to the conversation.  I can't figure out why...

 

Ha!  I wouldn't take it personally, particularly on teams where chat is limited to a few bits of banter or explicit instructions from the team/league leaders.  And it could just be a coincidence, too, in that your chat posted just as the team is ambushed or starts engaging the AV, etc.  By the time that is over, whatever you said may not be relevant anymore. 

 

Chat dies down (even in groups who always run together night after night) for all kinds of reasons, rarely because of anything anyone said (unless it's one of the whiny, "but WHHHHHYYYYYYY is this speed TF not clearing maps?????? I neeeeeeeedsssssss XP!," then yeah, no one will answer or chat about anything else because it's fun to let that whiny stuff sit there for everyone to read over and over while pointing and laughing).

[ForeverLaxx]

The closest I've ever gotten to giving "unsolicited" advice is when someone is bemoaning something about their powerset in team chat, which to me, is almost asking for help anyway. Like, a Mastermind complaining that his pets die too fast or don't hit hard enough and I notice they haven't taken any of the Upgrade powers or aren't running in Defensive (to which I also usually tell them how to change their auto-generated command buttons so they have a Follow Defensive one), or if they're complaining about missing all the time, running out of end after 3 attacks, etc.

 

I never just send a message out of nowhere to people who don't say anything first or random people I happen to pass by. I make weird builds all the time and I know I'd hate having randoms sending me messages that I'm doing it wrong. Yes, even on my Petless Demon Mastermind with Cross Punch.

[Bill Z Bubba]

1 hour ago, ForeverLaxx said:

they haven't taken any of the Upgrade powers or aren't running in Defensive

 

Tried that. They still suck.

[Tahliah]

52 minutes ago, ForeverLaxx said:

The closest I've ever gotten to giving "unsolicited" advice is when someone is bemoaning something about their powerset in team chat, which to me, is almost asking for help anyway. Like, a Mastermind complaining that his pets die too fast or don't hit hard enough and I notice they haven't taken any of the Upgrade powers or aren't running in Defensive (to which I also usually tell them how to change their auto-generated command buttons so they have a Follow Defensive one), or if they're complaining about missing all the time, running out of end after 3 attacks, etc.

 

I never just send a message out of nowhere to people who don't say anything first or random people I happen to pass by. I make weird builds all the time and I know I'd hate having randoms sending me messages that I'm doing it wrong. Yes, even on my Petless Demon Mastermind with Cross Punch.

 

I think this is completely reasonable.  However, the scenario the OP laid out was "I'm randomly reading random players' info I happen to see in a zone I happen to be sitting in reading random players' info and do you think I should send tells offering critiques of their build to these random people in a zone I happen to be in?".  The correct answer is "no." The OP is not talking about someone on his team, in his SG, or anywhere on his radar except they happen to be in the same zone and he likes to read strangers' info. 

 

Nothing wrong with the liking to read strangers' info, I do it, too, when I am waiting for a trial to fill or whatever, but it wouldn't even occur to me to send build advice to some random toon I saw in the Auction House or wherever.  I mean, really! 

 

Your scenario in which someone you are actually on a team with complains about their powers/etc. and you offer advice in response is completely different than I"m parked in AP/wherever waiting to offer UA to anyone there."

[Clave Dark 5]

I would have said "sure, long as you couch it friendly like" but I can see few like that, not one little bit.  Online discourse has really gotten rough.  I freely try to offer compliments because I know someone going "cool look!" always brightens my day, and I certainly offer help if someone's expressing trouble (I once got to explain about slotting for Stamina to a brute I was teaming with at low level who was suffering).  If nothing else, you could always phrase it something like "I see you skipped Awesomeness Power, I loved that on my brute, what was your thinking behind that?"  Make it more of a conversation that a one way street.

[Nemeroff]

If anything I'll politely phrase it into a question because they might know something I don't; like some kind of synergy or something.

 

Usually I let sleeping dogs lie.

[Nyghtmaire]

I was the recipient of unsolicited advice recently. Just let them type while I went on with my crafting. Suggestion was that I chose the wrong AT and that I should reroll (context of my grav/dark/stone controller). Made a note and blocked when all was said and done.  Cross-wise, never offer unsolicited advice. Will answer help questions but I limit it otherwise to congratulating players on cool names, fun costumes, and interesting backgrounds. 

[Nyghtmaire]

On 2/3/2022 at 8:33 PM, Saikochoro said:

Never in game. If someone wants advice they can ask for it.
 

I will look at people infos on a team just to see what powersets they are running so I can observe them in game. This provides me a lot of inspiration for new alts, but I never comment on their power choices or lack IOs or anything. At most I will say, “how have you been like seismic blast?”

I check power selection/bonuses in Team mainly to figure out how I can streamline my own play to make things smoother, especially when playing a support toon.

[Rishidian]

On 2/5/2022 at 9:29 AM, Nyghtmaire said:

I was the recipient of unsolicited advice recently. Just let them type while I went on with my crafting. Suggestion was that I chose the wrong AT and that I should reroll (context of my grav/dark/stone controller). Made a note and blocked when all was said and done.

Does advice = opinion?  Not always.  Telling someone they chose the wrong AT doesn't sound like advice, but more like their opinion, or they're trolling for an argument.  And I wont argue with a troll - I won't win, and it puts me on their level.  Better to ignore.

 

I try to follow this 'proverb':  "Opinions are like ass holes - Everyone has one, they all stink, and the only one that matters is your own".  I don't go around BA'ing everyone, and I appreciate it if they don't do it to me.  I agree, offering unsolicited advice can make you seem like a jerk - especially when offering (forcing?) an opinion without knowing any of the background of the toon or player. 

 

I've played COH since about Issue 2, and I don't feel qualified to offer advice.  I may answer a question, but that's rare.

[Bill Z Bubba]

Watched Help channel some last night. There was a discussion regarding brute vs tanker. I chose not to get involved even with the misinformation being stated and instead set it back to my general tab. Seemed like the far saner course of action.

[DarknessEternal]

No, always stay on topic.